I'm happy. Not the "giddy, everything is perfect, bouncing off the walls, obnoxious" happy. But the content, peaceful kind of happy. I usually smile the majority of the day.
However, something has been tugging at me. I love to blog. Love to write. And I have little messages from friends....texts, emails, or just dialogue in conversation that asks me when I plan to write next. That's pressure folks. lol This blank screen staring back at me can be intimidating some days, hence some postings being about nothing at all.....unlike the profound deep places I tend to take this to. So please settle in....I'm about to share some thoughts.
As I've shared before, I'm a facebook junkie. I love seeing what my buddies are up to, seeing pics, and sharing our lives. I've noticed in the last few months.....that negativity tends to breed here. What I love the most? Is the ability to seek prayer and the honor to pray for others in their needs. I'm very aware that where God is? That dirty 'ole stinkin devil.....likes to breed. I'm so scared that he is going to just take over.
What ever happened to just plain kindness and manners? I've seen such ugliness from people. They use FB as a weapon of sorts to pick on others. Or to air grievances. I've been known to get frustrated and rant or vent as well. So I'm pointing the finger at myself in some instances. But, Why on earth? And the majority of things I see written, people would never have the courage to say to anyone face-to-face. Its much easier to hide behind a keyboard. To take underhanded little digs at each other. To just be down-right nasty.....and be the first to say, "Who me??"
I've even noticed the little "feeling __________" that you can now place behind your status that goes FURTHER in clarifying the mood of the person. ----Feeling Happy. --------Feeling Blessed. ---------Feeling annoyed. Etc. etc. My rule of thumb is that if I have to insert something here that is in the "angry, annoyed" etc. group....I might not ought to post it.
On my "friends list", I have 1,036 friends. From high school friends, college friends, friends from the 4 cities I've lived in, family, church friends, and friends of friends. I am careful to accept friend requests of only people I know.....but of course the majority are acquaintances. My point is....over 1,000 people can see what I write on my page. Every comment, every picture, every status. Not to mention, the way FB is set up, folks who are NOT friends can see, too.
My words, however profound....or however silly....or whatever they are? Can reach a bunch of folks. Don't think for a second that I believe that they ALL read it. But the risk is there that they do. If I have the ability to stand before 1,000+ people -- what is it that I want to say? I certainly want to sound kind. I want to share the real me. I want them to "know we are Christians by our love." I don't want to fight with my friends or family in front of them. Or cuss and carry on. If I were in front of that many folks....I'd definitely try to put my best foot forward. Right? Well, you'd think so.
I don't have any actual stats....but common sense tells me that social media is the most useful tool that we as Christians can use to spread Jesus. That said....it is probably the most dangerous. It is up to us to use this tool for grace! I just want to scream that at least 40 times a day.
Got me to thinking about my own life.
I need to extend more grace to myself. To forgive myself for falling short of His glory. To make the changes...not wallowing in what has gone wrong. "We all got problems." Right? You don't want to hear about mine, anymore that I want to hear you whine about yours. Don't get me wrong. Asking for and letting others know how they can pray for you is wonderful. Letting people in on your life .....the vulnerability of the "real you" shows courage and is admirable. At least, according to me. haha... I'm just writing what is on my heart.....not trying to preach. I think I'm pretty clear about the intention of where this is heading.
Don't use facebook or any other media to be something you are not. Don't use it to prey on others for sympathy or for your own personal gain. Be real. Be real. Be real.
I've been digging into Proverbs 31. My long-range goals are to become that kind of woman. I'm no where close. And it's going to be a journey. In which I'll share. I've already started. And I've seen the Lord work. So cool it will give ya chills.
I need to extend more grace to my children. They have a scary place to grow up. This 'ole world is dark. They are faced with so many more temptations and ways to "fail" than we were. They live in a world where every one of their friends posts every new thing they buy. They instantly know when they are left out of a get-together. They know within minutes "who broke up with who".....or that "so-in-so" did this or that. They don't talk. Period. They text. They snap-chat. (even scarier than anything!), they tweet, they "IM"....etc etc. Society as we once knew it.....has surpassed us. And the devil is creeping in.
My Sam has had a "social media" free summer. I was losing him. I looked at the top of his head and had to repeat no less than 22 times a simple statement every time we talked. He was constantly glued to that phone. I made a believer of him during our vacation, when the first two days he was more consumed with the phone than our family. That Iphone was stripped of everything but phone calls. No texting, no facebook, no instagram, no twitter, no internet. Nothing.
You know what? I got my son back. We have talked. We have laughed. We have had some wonderful visits. One time, in two months, has he mentioned having it back. I shrugged it off, and that has been a couple of weeks ago. He has earned it back....but I've not given in just yet. And I will definitely place limits on things. I'm not smart enough to shelter my kids from everything bad. But by pulling the plug....I've made great strides and my relationship with my son is something very worth it. I plan to limit things as school starts. I have ONE shot with these kids. And I need to make the best of it.
I need to practice grace with my David. We always hurt the ones we love. We have an awesome relationship. One like no other I've ever had. And I'm spoiled rotten. He created a monster. lol I'll just leave it at that for now. He, too, has made changes and working to become a spiritual head for our relationship and in our future. I love this man! Don't let the tattoos fool ya. This man is a man of God. Inside and out.
I need to practice grace with my church. With THE church, which its "parts" are so much more than the "whole." Truly not a place for saints, but a hospital for sinners.
Finally, I just need to practice grace. Period. When I think of where I'd be without it? I shudder. I see changes all around me. In my life. In my relationships. And its the closest thing to peace I've ever felt. Couple of milestones to get behind me? And I'll be in the land of contentment.
Grace and Kindness. It's a peace that passes all understanding.
In Him,
Terri
PS. 2 for 2 on the "Tithing Journey". I've placed more in the plate than I had left for the last two weeks. The way the Lord has carried us and even blessed us will give you chills. I'm taking notes to share later! :) Its a faith I've never experienced!
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